In America There Are Two

The Great Arizona Desert Is Full Of The Bleaching Bones Of People Who Waited For Me To Start Something.

The Surest Way To Make A Monkey Of A Man Is To Quote Him.

Nothing Makes A Man Feel Older Than To Hear A Band Coming Up The Street And Not To Have The Impulse To Rush Downstairs And Out On To The Sidewalk.

My First Big Mistake Was Made When, In A Moment Of Weakness, I Consented To Learn The Game; For A Man Who Can Frankly Say "i Do Not Play Bridge" Is Allowed To Go Over In The Corner And Run The Pianola By Himself, While The Poor Neophyte, No Matter How Much He May Protest That He Isn't "at All A Good Player, In Fact I'm Perfectly Rotten," Is Never Believed, But Dragged Into A Game Where It Is Discovered, Too Late, That He Spoke The Truth.

The Surest Way To Make A Monkey Of A Man Is To Quote Him. That Remark In Itself Wouldn’t Make Any Sense If Quoted As It Stands. The Average Man Ought To Be Allowed A Quotation Of No Less Than Three Sentences, One To Make His Statement And Two To Explain What He Meant. Ralph Waldo Emerson Was About The Only One Who Could Stand Having His Utterances Broken Up Into Sentence Quotations, And Every Once In A While Even He Doesn’t Sound So Sensible In Short Snatches.