I'm Thankful For The Three

I Was One Of The First People To Almost Actually Vomit Over Hearing The Use Of The Phrase "family Values" And I Pride Myself On Never Having Fallen For The Idea That Barbara Bush Was Sweet And Grandmotherly. I Met Barbara Bush And, As I Expected, She Was A Tank With Eyes, Not A Nice Person At All And Why Should That Blow Anybody Away?

I'm The Only Person I Know Of Who's Ever Been Pulled Over For Attempted Speeding.

The Position Of First Lady Has No Rules, Just Precedent, So Its Evolution Has Been At A Virtual Standstill For Years. If Martha Washington Didn't Do It, Then No One Is Sure It Should Be Done.

I Love Key Lime Pie, Although It's Never Made The Proper Way.

When We Save The Rain Forest, The Polar Bear, And Al Gore, We Should Party So Hard That Canada Calls The Cops On Us For Noise.