Im Not The Voice Of

I'm Very Arrogant And Mean. I'm Almost Like A Bad Guy Professional Wrestler.

My First Time On Stage Was The Class "graduation" At The Comedy Store. It Was Awesome. Everything Got Huge Laughs And I Just Thought I Knew How To Do Comedy.

I Think A Theater Show Is A Pure Version Of Me Doing My Material. The Theater Crowd Is A Bit More Polite, There Really Aren't Hecklers, And There Are A Lot Of People There To See Me, And They're Excited About The Jokes And Hanging Out With Me For A Show.

My Neighbor Complains Every Time My Girlfriend And I Have Sex. We're Not Even That Loud. But He Used To Date My Girlfriend.

Halloween Is Just A Made Up Holiday, Created By The Razor Blade Industry.