I'm Always Working On A

The Most Important Thing Is To Write Material That You Think Is Funny. If You Don't Think It's Funny, But You're Convinced That Other People Will Think It Is, Well They Won't.

While Some Of My Closest Friends Were Jocks, It Seemed That They Spoke A Different Language With Each Other. Joining In Their Conversation Was Fraught With Risk.

One Christmas My Father Kept Our Tree Up Till March. He Hated To See It Go. I Loved That.

I Was Not A Jock In High School. I Know, You're Shocked.

My Sophomore Year I Spent Exactly One Day On The Jv Football Team. It Was The Tryout Day.