I'm A Doofus From The

I'm A Comedian, Not A Politician.

My Motto Is "more Mystery, Less History".

Of Course On Air I Use Occasional Hyperbole To Tell A Story.

I Don't Like Soccer. I Think It Makes You Soft. And By The Way, You Telling Me It's The Biggest Whatever In The World, Look, They Drink Tea Everywhere Too; They're Pussies, You Understand? I Want Some Coffee.

I Feel Like I'm A Time Traveler From The Future Who Has Been Sent Back To Be Annoyed.