If I Had A Dime

I Used To Play A Narcissistic-conservative Pundit. Now, I'm Just A Narcissist.

God Works In Mysterious Ways But At Least He Works, He's Never On Welfare In A Mysterious Way.

Oops! I Always Thought Peta Stood For Please Eat This Animal.

If Anybody Needs Anything Else At Their Tables, Just Speak Slowly And Clearly Into Your Table Numbers. Someone From The Nsa Will Be Right Over With A Cocktail.

If Obama Can Force You To Get Health Insurance Just By Calling It A Tax, Than There Is Nothing To Stop Him From Making You Gay Marry An Illegal Immigrant Wearing A Condom On A Hydroponic Pot Farm Powered By Solar Energy.