I Would Start A Revolution,

Do You Remember That Kid That Had Sex With His High School Teacher? I Was Reading Online That He Died Today. He Died From Hi-fiveing.

I Am Going To Be The Next Ryan Gosling.

Head Gear, Plus Acne Equals...table For One In The Cafeteria.

Hookers Don't Like To Snuggle.

I Used To Be Really Cute. I Could Send You Earlier Photos Where I'm Stunning. But I've Gained About Twenty Pounds Over The Past Two Years, And The More Weight I've Put On, The More Success I've Had. If You Drew A Diagram Of Weight Gain And Me Getting More Work, A Mathematician Would Draw Some Conclusions From That.