I Was The Best Man

Surveys Show That The #1 Fear Of Americans Is Public Speaking. #2 Is Death. That Means That At A Funeral, The Average American Would Rather Be In The Casket Than Doing The Eulogy.

I Admire The Hell Out Of Her. You Can't Have Sex With Someone You Admire.

I Had A Dream Last Night That A Hamburger Was Eating Me.

Actually, The Only Memory I Have Of Being A Cub Scout Was Trying To Get My Hat Back. That Was All I Did. Run Back And Forth At My Bus Stop Going "quit It."

Dating Is Pressure And Tension. What Is A Date, Really, But A Job Interview That Lasts All Night?