I Thought, 'if You're Going

I Laugh When I End Up On The Worst-dressed Lists. I'm Not Trying To Be Fashionable. I Know I'm Kind Of A Cartoon Character. Do People Honestly Think I'm Wearing A Kafkan In Order To Be Fashionable?

My Father Is A Great Grandfather. He's A Wonderful Grandfather, But He's A Terrible Husband.

I Was Afraid Of Staying At The Playboy Mansion; I Wanted To Get A Footing Before I Ventured Into A World Of Hedonism.

My Boots Use Recycled Electronics And Recycled Plastics From The Ocean.

People Who Wear Fur Smell Like A Wet Dog If They're In The Rain. And They Look Fat And Gross.