I Think Women Like Ferraris.

I Think There's A Percentage [of The Audience] That Don't Realize, That Don't Know That [standup] Is How Everything Began. We Planned It, We Work Hard, Rehearsals To Get This. It's More Of A ... It's Not Just Coming In There In A T-shirt And Holding A Microphone.

My Mom Said The Only Reason Men Are Alive Is For Lawn Care And Vehicle Maintenance.

Anytime You Work With Animals, You Begin To See More Humanity In Them.

Boys Can Be Disgusting. You Can't Leave Us Alone For Any Length Of Time Because We Will Burn Something, Blow Something Up Or Paint Something. We're Just Obnoxious.

I'm A Creative Guy, Artistically With Graphics.