I Tell Very Mean Jokes.

I Don't Want To Wake Up With Cops Surrounding My Bed Tonight.

I'm A Comedian And There Are A Lot Of Things I'm Still Learning. I Love One Liners Because I Love Smart Jokes. I Also Don't Like Complaining About Society Or Whining About My Life On Stage.

Todd Glass Has Amazing Energy On Stage. Dave Attell Is One Of My Favorites Because He's A One Liner Comic Who Is Always Incredibly In The Moment With The Audience. As For Newer People, I Think Adrienne Iapalucci Writes Some Great, Dark Jokes And Sean Patton Has A Hilarious Voice On Stage.

It Seemed Fun To Play A Villain On Stage And I Wanted My Jokes To Be So Good That I Could Just Calmly Tell Them On Stage.

I Think My Friends Wife Has Been Banging A Black Guy. Because They Just Had A Baby. And The Baby Had A Hole In It.