I Teach Sunday School, Motherf*****.

It Would Be A Very Short Pint. It Would Be Gummy Bears And Matzah, And Be Called Chewy Jewy.

Last Night, We Did The Threatdown -- God, It's Hard To Even Talk About This -- And For The First Time, I Didn't Mention Bears. It's Winter, They're Asleep, I Didn't Think It Would Be A Problem. But Today I See This In The Toronto Globe And Mail -- Apparently A 700-pound Polar Bear Showed Up At A Children's Hockey Game. I've Said This Before, They're After Our Kids -- They're Tender, Juicy, You Don't Even Have To Throw Away The Bones.

I'm Proud Of My Ability To Understand What Somebody Else Is Trying To Do And Help Them Achieve It, Because Part Of The Aesthetic Of Improvisation Is Service. You Never Say No. Serve The Servant, Follow The Follower. And That's Very Valuable In Your Life, As Well As Very Valuable In Your Actor's Work. I'm Damn Proud Of My Ability To Help Other People Achieve Their Ideas.

Thinking That Other People Might Be Better Than You Is What Makes You Canadian, Not American.

In Order To Maintain An Untenable Position, You Have To Be Actively Ignorant. One Motto On The Show Is, 'keep Your Facts, I'm Going With The Truth.'