I Spent A Year In

I Drink Coffee With My Right Hand, And I Smoke With My Left. But I Talk With Both Hands.

The Happiest People I Know Are The Ones That Are Still Working. The Saddest Are The Ones Who Are Retired. Very Few Performers Retire On Their Own. It's Usually Because No One Wants Them. Six Years Ago Sinatra Announced His Retirement. He's Still Working.

Too Bad That All The People Who Know How To Run The Country Are Busy Driving Taxicabs And Cutting Hair.

In Show Business The Key Word Is Honesty. Once You've Learned To Fake That, The Rest Is Easy.

I Like Women To Be Attracted To Me. See, When You Get 60 Years Old, And They Know You're 60, The Only Women You Can Get Are 55-year-old Women, And I Like Younger Women.