I Love To Go To

My Timing Is So Precise, A Heckler Would Have To Make An Appointment Just To Get A Word In.

My Recipe For Dealing With Anger And Frustration: Set The Kitchen Timer For Twenty Minutes, Cry, Rant, And Rave, And At The Sound Of The Bell, Simmer Down And Go About Business As Usual.

I'm Eighteen Years Behind In My Ironing. There's No Use Doing It Now, It Doesn't Fit Anybody I Know.

You Know You're Old When Someone Compliments You On Your Alligator Shoes, And You're Barefoot.

I Hate Smart Sales Clerks. I Said To One, What Do You Have In Lingerie? She Says, More Than You'll Ever Have!