I Love Research. I'd Go

Don't Ever Feel That You Have To Hide Who You Are. Nothing Good Ever Comes From Keeping Secrets Like That.

I Am Still Learning About Love. I Thought I Understood It--not Just Mother Love, But The Love For One's Parents, For One's Husband, And For One's Laotong. I've Experienced The Other Types Of Love--pity Love, Respectful Love And Gratitude Love. But Looking At Our Secret Fan With Its Messages Written Between Snow Flower And Me Over Many Years, I See That I Didn't Value The Most Important Love--deep-heart Love.

Our Words Had To Be Circumspect. We Could Not Write Anything Too Negative About Our Circumstances. This Was Tricky, Since The Very Form Of A Married Woman's Letter Needed To Include The Usual Complaints -- That We Were Pathetic, Powerless, Worked To The Bone, Homesick, And Sad. We Were Supposed To Speak Directly About Our Feelings Without Appearing Ungrateful, No-account, Or Unfilial.

People Write To Me All The Time, And I Write Back.

Perhaps He Was Afraid As I Was That We'd Be Caught. Or Perhaps He Was Breathing Me In Just As I Was Letting Him Come Into My Lungs, My Eyes, My Heart.