I Love Australia. First Of

Every Night, It's A Bakery On The Bus. It's A Curse, Because I Talk About How Much I Love Cake, People Bring Me Cake. And Now I Just Found Out I'm Diabetic, So I'm Like, Are You Kidding Me?!

I Don't Have To Worry About Writing Jokes. I Just Tell Stories About Things That Have Happened To Me. As Long As I'm Alive And I'm Living And I'm Experiencing Different Things Every Day, The Show Will Always Change.

I Try Not To Get Political, I Don't Want To Get Religious, I Don't Want To Get Controversial, I Just Want To Have A Show That Relates To Everybody.

I Just Know You Can Not Be On Top Forever. There's Always Going To Be The Next Guy, And If I'm Going To Go Down, I'd Like To Know I Helped The Next Guy Take My Spot. You Can't Prevent The Inevitable, But You Can Join The Ship.

I Was Very Dirty; I Was A Very Dirty Comic. There Was No Way I Would Have Gotten On Tv With The Act I Had When I First Started.