I Do Not Make Jokes

Everybody's Always Asking Me About My Blood Pressure. They Did An Interview Once Where They Hooked Me Up To A Blood Pressure Machine And They'd Rile Me. I'd Yell And Scream, And Then It Would Just Go Back To Normal In A Few Minutes. Everything Else Is Probably Rotting, But The Blood Pressure Is Spectacular.

The Republicans Are The Party Of Bad Ideas. The Democrats Are The Party Of No Ideas.

It's Amazing What I Could've Written In My Life If I Had Realized That I Should Keep Writing And Not Masturbating.

Republicans Have Nothing But Bad Ideas And Democrats Have No Ideas.

Ninety Percent Of A Shirt That Not Only Was Bright Purple And Green But With A Design On It That, If You Moved Too Quickly, Might Cause A Seizure In An Unsuspecting Onlooker.