I Bought A Dictionary. First

I Noticed That There Are No B Batteries. I Think That's To Avoid Confusion, Cause If There Were You Wouldn't Know If Someone Was Stuttering. 'yes, Hello I'd Like Some B-batteries.' 'what Kind?' 'b-batteries.' 'what Kind?' 'b-batteries!' And D-batteries That's Hard For Foreigners. 'yes, I Would Like De Batteries.'

I Think The Best Thing About Being Dumb Is That It Makes Magic A Lot Better. Where The Hell Did That Rat Come From? I Dunno, But I'm Calling The Cops Because He Just Cut That Lady In Half.

My Friend Asked Me I Ever Swam With Dolphins. I Was Like, 'yeah, Of Course. What Distance Are We Talking About From The Dolphins? Because The Last Time I Was In The Ocean, I'm Pretty Sure I Swam With Most Of Them.'

I Went To Law School. I Found It Interesting For The First Three Weeks. By The Fourth Week, I Found It Tedious. I Got Bored And Grew Restless. I Had No Other Plan For A Job, Because From Seventh Grade On, I Had Planned On Law. So I Shifted My Focus From Classes To Extracurricular Activities.

You Are Ten Times More Likely To Get Hit By A Car When The Driver Is Aiming For You.