Hey Kids! Let's Put On

Always Get Married In The Morning. That Way If It Doesn't Work Out, You Haven't Wasted The Whole Day.

I'm The Only Man In The World With A Marriage Licence Made Out To Whom It May Concern.

And That's The Way I Have Always Lived, For The Laughs – Today. N-o-w. No Other Way.

I Hear Jerry Falwell Every Sunday Here Talking About The Devil And Hollywood. . . . I'm Gonna Write Him A Letter. Hollywood Wasn't Built On Filth And Dirt - It Was Built On Talent.

There Were Times When I Was Broke, When I Was Down In Florida And I Had To Go To Cocktail Parties For 500 Bucks - To See The Guy That Used To Be In Pictures. I'm Not Ashamed Of That. I've Never Done Anything That I Was Ashamed Of. I've Done A Lot Of Things I Didn't Mean To Do.