He Said 'i'm Going To

I Went To Buy Some Camouflage Trousers The Other Day But I Couldn’t Find Any.

My Wife Had A Go At Me Last Night. She Said, Youll Drive Me To My Grave. I Had The Car Out In Thirty Seconds.

I Had A Meal Last Night. I Ordered Everything In French, Surprised Everybody. It Was A Chinese Restaurant. I Said To This Chinese Waiter, 'look, This Chicken I Got Here Is Cold.' He Said, 'it Should Be, It's Been Dead Two Weeks.'

I Used To Be Indecisive But Now I Am Not Quite Sure

I've Been On The Whisky Diet - I've Already Lost Three Days!