He Lasted About As Long

I Had Fun Pretending To Be A Sportscaster. People Always Think That Was A Down Thing For Me. I Had The Best Job In Sports Broadcasting For Two Years.

The World Is So Ass-backwards It Almost Makes You Wish You Were Dyslexic.

It Takes Zero Politically Correct People To Screw In A Lightbulb Because They Are Perpetually In The Dark.

With Browns' Ticket Prices What They Are, You Just Know That All Those Dads Who Brought The Entire Family To Sit In The 'dog Pound' Are Secretly Calculating How Much Blood They're Going To Have To Sell Next Week To Put Groceries On The Table.

I Come From That Earlier Time In America When Palm Pilot Was A Nickname You Recieved Upon Entering Puberty! I Was More Than A Palm Pilot I Was The Palm Chuck Jager. Tom Wolfe Wrote A Book About Me Called The Right Hand Stuff. I Was The Only Guy In My Class Hip Enough To Move To The European Grip.