Happiness Is Seeing The Muscular

Never Marry A Girl Named 'marie' Who Used To Be Known As 'murray'.

Happiness Is Being Stuck In An Elevator And Discovering The Ravishing Blonde With You Is A Liquor Salesman With A Case Of Samples.

There Was This Billy Goat At A Movie Studio Who Found And Ate A Can Of Film. When A Nanny Asked Him How He Liked It, He Said, "it Was All Right But I Liked The Book Better."

For Days After Death Hair And Fingernails Continue To Grow, But Phone Calls Taper Off.

Democracy Is Buying A Big House You Can't Afford With Money You Don't Have To Impress People You Wish Were Dead. And, Unlike Communism, Democracy Does Not Mean Having Just One Ineffective Political Party; It Means Having Two Ineffective Political Parties.