For Me, Being A Woman

I Can't Watch Other People Doing Comedy. As Soon As Somebody Starts Being Funny I Have To Turn Off Because It Upsets Me. I Get Comedy Indigestion. I Just Hate Anybody Else Being Funny. That's My Job.

I Might Be Needy, Competitive And Desperate But It's Far Better Than Being Wet.

I Was Trained As An Actress. But I Wasn't A Very Convincing Actress, So I Started Doing Punk Poetry And Then Fell Into Doing Stand-up.

There Should Be More Booing In Shops And Restaurants And Places Like That When When The Service Is Bad. If You've Had A Poor Breakfast In A Hotel, You Should Put Your Knife And Fork Down And Boo.

I Have A Fear Of Poverty In Old Age. I Have This Vision Of Myself Living In A Skip And Eating Cat Food. It's Because I'm Freelance, And I've Never Had A Proper Job. I Don't Have A Pension, And My Savings Are Dwindling. I Always Thought Someone Would Just Come Along And Look After Me.