Even If You're Not Christian,

I Just Realized That There Are Going To Be A Lot Of Painful Times In Life, So I Better Learn To Deal With Them In The Right Way.

I Try Not To Tune In To Politics Until It's Two Or Three Months Before The Election. Till Then, It's Like Watching Preseason Football.

The Republicans Didn't Want The Government To Run Your Life, Because Jesus Should. That Was Really Part Of Their Thing: Less Government, More Jesus. Now It's Like, How About More Government And Jesus?

There Is Nothing We Can't Do. So It's Just The Fact That We're Doing Topics Like That That Other People, Especially Network Tv, Won't Touch, That We're Satirists.

A Scotch Buzz Is The Best Buzz In The World.