Don't You Think It's Strange

I Don't Want People To Think I Believe In God.

I Think Being A Doctor Is Really Hard, And It's Really This Thankless, Never-ending Job. It's Not Even That You Get Done With A Project. There Are Always Sick People.

You Can Never Find The Right Bowling Ball. This One's Too Heavy. This One's Good But Its Pink!

There Is The Vegetarian Hot Pocket For Those Of Us Who Don't Want To Eat Meat, But Would Still Like Diarrhea.

I've Always Wanted To Be An Actor. I've Never Planned On The Acting And The Stand-up Feeding Each Other; They've Always Been Separate Desires.