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My Goal In Life Was To Host The Mtv Awards, Because It's The Awards Show That Prince Sang On, And That Was The Awards Show That Eddie Murphy Hosted And Arsenio Hosted.

There Are A Lot Of Good Comics, No Doubt, But As Far As The Quality Of The Comics Goes, I Think What You Have Is A Bunch Of Situational Comics - There Are Black Comics That Work Only Black Crowds, Gay Comics That Do Only Gay Crowds, And Southern Comics That Only Work Down South, And So On With Asian, Latino, Indian, Midgets, Etc. The Previous Generation's Comics Were Better Because They Had To Make Everybody Laugh.

You Want To Track Hollywood Careers, Look In The Real Estate Section. You See A Guy Buy A House That Costs $6 Million, And You Can Literally Start Counting The Days Until He Starts Doing Crappy Movies.

Men Do Not Settle Down. Men Surrender.

Whoever You Hate Will End Up In Your Family. You Don't Like Gays? You're Gonna Have A Gay Son. You Don't Like Puerto Ricans? Your Daughter's Gonna Come Home With Livin' La Vida Loca!