By Reading This Message You

I'm The Fortieth Ugliest Man In This Bar. But So What! So What!... Isn't This How People Used To Fall In Love?

Summer Is A Latvian Chicken. We Make Foolish Choices. We Think We’re Young Again. We Run With Outstretched Arms Toward An Object Of Love And It Pecks Us And Pecks Us Until We’re Standing There Snot-nosed And Teary In The Middle Of Astor Place And The Sun Sets Fire To Our Penguin Shirts And All That Is Left To Do Is Go To Our Air-conditioned Homes And Ponder The Cruelty Of Our Finest Season.

Before My First Novel, I Was Dating A Woman Who Later Went To Prison For Bashing A Guy With A Hammer.

I Was Really Not A Good Student, And I Felt That Shame Every Day. That's One Of The Reasons I Started Smoking Pot And Drinking Daily.

By Reading This Message You Are Denying Its Existence And Implying Consent.