Big Scandal On The New

The Republican Debate Got Pretty Heated. They Spent Most Of Their Time Arguing Over Who God Called First.

The Leaders Of The Taliban Said Today That Killing Bin Laden Won't Solve The Problem. But, You Know, It Couldn't Hurt.

John Kerry's Wife Teresa Heinz Is On The Cover Of Newsweek Magazine This Week And They Said That If He Is Elected President, She Will Be The Oldest First Lady In American History. But That Doesn't Bother John Kerry, He Said, 'to Me, She Looks Like A Million Bucks'

According To Government Auditors, The Stimulus Money Is Being Held Up Because There Aren't Enough Government Workers To Oversee The Spending. So Follow Me, In Other Words, Government Workers Who Aren't There Are Needed To Spend Money We Don't Have To Create Jobs That Don't Exist.

They Said These North Korean Missiles Had Enough Range To Hit Seattle, But Residents In Seattle Were Not Worried. Today Bill Gates Said Microsoft Has Enough Missiles To Destroy North Korea Ten Times Over.