Being A Comedian, People Tell

You Might Be A Redneck If You Think Silence Of The Lambs Is What Happens When Larry Walks Out To The Barn.

You Might Be A Redneck If You Consider Pork And Beans To Be A Gourmet Food.

If You Ahve Ever Unloaded Your Pickup By Backing Up Really Fast And Slamming On The Brakes, You Might Be A Redneck.

My Wife Is So Analytical With Raising Kids, And I Am Not. My Feeling Is If They Turn Out Good, Then That Means I Was A Good Daddy And Put A Lot Of Effort Into It. If They Turn Out Bad, It Means They Took After Her Side Of The Family.

Changing A Diaper Is A Lot Like Getting A Present From Your Grandmother - You're Not Sure What You've Got But You're Pretty Sure You're Not Going To Like It.