Apply Truth Liberally To The

After Obsessively Googling Symptoms For Four Hours, I Discovered 'obsessively Googling Symptoms' Is A Symptom Of Hypochondria.

Football Is American; Why Are The Romans Numering Our Bowls?!

Sir, Pay No Attention To The People Who Say The Glass Is Half Empty, Because 32% Means It's 2/3 Empty. There's Still Some Liquid In That Glass Is My Point, But I Wouldn't Drink It. The Last Third Is Usually Backwash. (said To President Bush At The White House Correspondents Dinner)

You Have To Do Your First Penance Before Your First Holy Communion. You're Really Young. What Do You Know? You've Got Nothing To Confess. All I Knew Was That I Was An Evil Human Whose Sins Caused The Death Of Our Lord.

Sure, Integrating Schools May Sound Benign. But Whats The Use Of Living In A Gated Community If My Kids Go To School And Get Poor All Over Them?