And Yet You Are All

The Problem Is That You Don't Just Choose Recovery. You Have To Keep Choosing Recovery, Over And Over And Over Again. You Have To Make That Choice 5-6 Times Each Day. You Have To Make That Choice Even When You Really Don't Want To. It's Not A Single Choice, And It's Not Easy.

I Get Absolutely Shitfaced. I Am Shitfaced And Hyper And Ten Years Old. I Am Having The Time Of My Life.

You Will Miss Her Sometimes. Bear In Mind She's Trying To Kill You. Bear In Mind You Have A Life To Live.

One Really Ought To Be Afraid Of Self-torture. But It Tempted Me. It Begged. The Dark Place That My Mind Was Fast Becoming Blends, In My Memory, With The Dark Womb Of Church: The Chant, The Fugue Of Prayer, The Strange Erotic Energy That Carving A Very Small Cross Into My Thigh With A Nail Had Brought.

Me And My Needs Were Driving My Mother Away. Me And My Needs Retreated To My Closet, Disappeared Into Fairy Tales. I Started Making Up A World Where My Needs Wouldn´t Exist At All.