A Sceptic Finds Dallas Absurd.

A Sceptic Finds Dallas Absurd. A Cynic Thinks The Public Doesn't

Humphrey Searle Writes Music That Sounds Like The Theme From 'star Wars' Played Backwards Through A Washing Machine.

When You Cut It Up, Put The Pieces In Your Mouth And Swallowed Them, The British Hamburger Shaped Itself To The Bottom On Your Stomach Like Ballast, While Interacting With Your Gastric Juices To Form An Incipient Belch Of Enormous Potential, An Airship Which Had Been Inflated In A Garage. This Belch, When Silently Released, Would Cause People Standing Twenty Yards Away To Start Examining The Soles Of Their Shoes. The Vocalized Version Sounded Like A Bag Of Tools Thrown Into A Bog.

All Honest Labor Becomes Easy; It Only Becomes Hard When Done With Unwillingness.

In The Twelfth Century The Basque Fishermen Of Biarritz Used To Hunt Whales With Deadly Efficiency. When The Whales Sensibly Moved Away, The Basques Chased Them Further And Further, With The Consequence That The Fishermen Of Biarritz Discovered America Before Columbus Did. This Is A Matter For Local Pride But On A Larger View It Is Not Quite So Stunning, Since With The Possible Exception Of The Swiss Everybody Discovered America Before Columbus Did.