A Man Walks Into A

Doctor Told Me I've Got Two Weeks To Live. I Said: "can I Have The Last Week In July And The 1st Week In August?"

It's Never Occurred To Me To Worry About My Health, Or That I'll Get Old, Or That People Will Stop Laughing At Me.

My Wife Said To Me: 'if You Won The Lottery, Would You Still Love Me?' I Said: 'of Course I Would. I'd Miss You, But I'd Still Love You.'

A Man Walks Into A Hospital Feeling Unwell And The Doctor Says: "sorry, You've Only Got Three Minutes To Live." The Man Said: "can You Do Something For Me?" "yes," He Said. "i'll Boil You An Egg."

An Englishman, An Irishman And A Scotsman Walk Into A Bar. The Barman Looks At Them And Says: "is This Some Kind Of A Joke?"