A Comedian Has To Live

Learn How To Cook. Read Books That Will Educate You. Get An Education. Get A Career. And Support Yourself. And Live In A Section Of Town That Isn't Conducive To Violence.

They're Working Their Way Down. Next Year, Todd Bridges Gets The Award. When I Was A Kid I Wanted To Be Eddie Murphy And Now I'm A Rip-off Of Eddie Murphy.

People Are The Same Wherever You Go. And If They Weren't, They Wouldn't Laugh At The Same S**t.

You Can Only Offend Me If You Mean Something To Me.

Relationships, Easy To Get Into, Hard To Maintain. Why Are They So Hard To Maintain? Because It’s Hard To Keep Up The Lie! ‘cause You Can’t Get Nobody Being You. You Got To Lie To Get Somebody. You Can’t Get Nobody Looking Like You Look, Acting Like You Act, Sounding Like You Sound. When You Meet Somebody For The First Time, You’re Not Meeting Them. You’re Meeting Their Representative!