Charlie Sheen Is To Stand-up

I Can't Defend Someone Else's Jokes. I Can Only Defend My Jokes, And I Have To Live With My Own Jokes.

My Life And My Career Have Been A Series Of Happy And Not So Happy Accidents.

Comedy Comes From Pain, And No One Knows That Better Than This Woman Roseanne Barr—who Was Molested As A Child. Uch. That Poor Molester. Roseanne Never Got Over It. She Felt Violated. She Had Trust Issues. She Never Got The Candy He Promised Her.

My Best Friend Is Disabled. There's Nothing He Hates More Than Being Left Out Of The Jokes, To Be Treated With Kid Gloves. That's The Insult.

Charlie Sheen Is To Stand-up What Larry Flynt Is To Standing Up.