Before I Was A Comedian,

You Cannot Win In A Fight Against Women, Cause Men Have A Need To Make Sense

You Know The World Is Messed Up When The Tallest Man In The Nba Is Chinese, The Best Golfer Is Black, And The Best Rapper Is White.

A White Boy That Makes C's In College Can Make It To The White House.

Daddy Pays For The Water, Daddy Pays For The Gas, Daddy Pays For The Electricity, And If Daddy Didn't Pay For The Electricity, He'd Pay For The Candle On Your Nightstand, So You Can Study For The Big Test Tomorrow.

Comedy Is The Blues For People Who Can’t Sing.