Zip Zop Wop Boopity Bop.

There Are Certain Times Of The Day When You Need A Balance - That Is, Your Protein And Your Carbs. I'm A Barry Sears Man. I Believe That Anything Green Is A Carb, And I Need 2:1. Two Of The Carbs To One Of The Protein.

My Grandpa Didn't Believe In Hugging And Kissing, Or Saying I Love You. His Love Had To Do With The Way He Treated You. When He Said, We're Going Here, We're Going There, He Was Telling Me About Life. That Was His Love For Me. My Love For Him Was Listening To What He Said, Keeping Out Of Trouble, Doing Right, Being Fair.

As I Have Discovered By Examining My Past, I Started Out As A Child. Coincidentally, So Did My Brother. My Mother Did Not Put All Her Eggs In One Basket, So To Speak: She Gave Me A Younger Brother Named Russell, Who Taught Me What Was Meant By 'survival Of The Fittest.'

I Recently Turned Fifty, Which Is Young For A Tree, Mid-life For An Elephant, And Ancient For A Quarter-miler, Whose Son Now Says, "dad, I Just Can't Run The Quarter With You Anymore, Unless I Bring Something To Read."

I Wasn't Always Black... There Was This Freckle, And It Got Bigger And Bigger.