You Know Who Must Be

Political Experts Are Saying The Reason John Kerry Is Doing So Well Is Because He's 'electable.' Hey, So Was Al Gore - In Fact, He Even Got Elected And It Didn't Help Him At All.

Texas Governor Rick Perry Said God Is Calling On Him To Run For President. But Michele Bachmann Said That God Is Calling On Her To Run For President. You Know, If God Is That Indecisive, He's Probably For Mitt Romney!

For The First Time Ever, Women Are Scoring Higher Than Men On Iq Tests. Scientists Say It Has Something To Do With Breast Implants -- Not That It Makes The Women Smarter, It Just Makes The Men Dumber.

Elections In L.a. Are So Different. Here You've Got Politicians With Phony Smiles Making False Promises To Voters With Fake Boobs And Bad Toupees.

John Kerry Said Today He Wants To Debate President Bush Once A Month. Hey Good Luck, If Bush Couldn't Make It To The National Guard Once A Month, He's Not Going To Show Up For This.