You Know What Ken Lay

The Latest Report Is That Osama Bin Laden Has Shaved His Beard, Is Wearing Western Clothes And Has Had Plastic Surgery. Isn't That Amazing? The Guy Has Made Just Two Videos And He's Already Gone Hollywood.

In Chicago Some Anti-mitt Romney Protesters Told Reporters They're Being Paid To Protest. They Said They're Being Paid By Democrats To Stand Outside And Chant Anti-romney Slogans. Well, Who Says President Obama Isn't Creating Any New Jobs?

The Pentagon Still Has Not Given A Name To The Iraqi War. Somehow 'operation Re-elect Bush' Doesn't Seem To Be Popular.

Real Movement In The Kerry Campaign Now. His Poll Numbers Are Moving, Donations Are Moving, Endorsements Are Moving. The Only Thing Not Moving Is His Hair.

With Hurricanes, Tornados, Fires Out Of Control, Mud Slides, Flooding, Severe Thunderstorms Tearing Up The Country From One End To Another, And With The Threat Of Bird Flu And Terrorist Attacks, "are We Sure This Is A Good Time To Take God Out Of The Pledge Of Allegiance?