You Can't Be Friends With

Someone, I Was Beginning To Suspect, Had A Bit Of A Gangster Complex. It Wasn't Really Very Hard To Figure Out Who. I Mean, I Was Guessing It Wasn't Christopher's Aunt Jackie.

High School Sucks. People Who Say Those Were The Best Years Of Your Life - Those People Are Liars... Who Wants The Best Years Of Their Life To Be In *high School*? High School Is Something *everybody* Should Be Ready To Lose.

And I'm Going To Tell The Truth: I Didn't Like That Sean Penn Movie Into The Wild So Much. Yes! I Know It Was Critically Acclaimed. I Know It Won All These Awards! It's Very Sad That A Boy Is Dead And All. But I Thought The Movie Enchanted, With The Singing Princess And The Chipmunk And The People Dancing In Central Park, Was Cuter. So There!

My Mother's Psychologist Says I Have An Overactive Anger Switch, But People Just Keep Pissing Me Off.

Anybody Can Be A Princess. All You Have Todo Is Have The Right Parents. It's No Harder Than Being Born Paris Hilton, For God's Sake. At Least You Remember To Put On Underwear In The Morning, I'm Assuming