When You've Finished Using A

I'm Sorry, But Having An Aston Martin Db9 On The Drive And Not Driving It Is A Bit Like Having Keira Knightley In Your Bed And Sleeping On The Couch.

Does Anyone Really Imagine For A Moment That My Wife Gives Two Stuffs About Global Warming? She Certainly Did Not Appear To Be All That Bothered On Thursday Evening When, During The Great Carbon-saving Switch-off, I Ran Round The House Furiously Turning On Every Light, Hair Dryer, Dishwasher And Toaster.

Boredom Forces You To Ring People You Haven’t Seen For Eighteen Years And Halfway Through The Conversation You Remember Why You Left It So Long. Boredom Means You Start To Read Not Only Mail-order Catalogues But Also The Advertising Inserts That Fall On The Floor. Boredom Gives You Half A Mind To Get A Gun And Go Berserk In The Local Shopping Centre, And You Know Where This Is Going. Eventually, Boredom Means You Will Take Up Golf.

You're A Car, But Most Of All, What You Are, What You've Become, Is A Mate. And That's What Makes A Car Special. That's What Makes A Car Great. You Start To Think Of It As A Person. You Start To Love It.

I'm A Horse Of A Man!