When Earth Gets Good And

Satire Is Tragedy Plus Time.

If You're From New York And You're Catholic, You're Still Jewish. If You're From Butte Montana And You're Jewish, You're Still Goyisch. The Air Force Is Jewish, The Marine Corps Dangerous Goyisch. Rye Bread Is Jewish, Instant Potatoes, Scary Goyisch. Eddie Cantor Is Goyisch, George Jessel Is Goyisch-coleman Hawkins Is Jewish.

I've Been Accused Of Bad Taste, And I'll Go Down To My Grave Accused Of It And Always By The Same People, The Ones Who Eat In Restaurants That Reserve The Right To Refuse Service To Anyone.

Part Of The Kick Of Making People Laugh Was Doing Something Different. We Were A Rare Breed - Spotting One Of Us Was Like Pinning A Space Alien, Or Abdominal Snowman. There Were Maybe A Hundred Stand-ups In The Whole Country When I Was Doing It.

My Mother-in-law Broke Up My Marriage. My Wife Came Home From Work One Day And Found Me In Bed With Her.