When A Child Is Locked

There Is Nothing More Miserable In The World Than To Arrive In Paradise And Look Like Your Passport Photo.

Poached Eggs Are Good, Poached Animals Are Not.

I've Exercised With Women So Thin That Buzzards Followed Them To Their Cars.

Never Go To A Doctor Whose Office Plants Have Died.

Adults Can Take A Simple Holiday For Children And Screw It Up. What Began As A Presentation Of Simple Gifts To Delight And Surprise Children Around The Christmas Tree Has Culminated In A Woman Unwrapping Six Shrimp Forks From Her Dog, Who Drew Her Name.