Whatever I Write In Email,

If I Was A President I Want To Put An End To Only Large Financial Contributors, Lobbyists, Inside-the-beltway Fat Cats, And Corporate Bigwigs Getting To Sleep In The Lincoln Bedroom. I Will Keep That Room Open Only For People For Whom It Is Too Late To Drive After Attending One Of My Secret-underground-bunker-after-hours Parties.

If Someone Ever Asks You To Do Something For Them, Do It Really Bad So You Never Have To Do It Again.

A Life Without Orgasms Is Like A World Without Flowers.

Every Woman Should Have Four Pets In Her Life. A Mink In Her Closet, A Jaguar In Her Garage, A Tiger In Her Bed, And A Jackass Who Pays For Everything.

I'm The Kind Of Person Who, If I See A Shooting Star, I Wouldn't Stay There And Watch It. I'd Run To My Friends And Tell Them Because I Would Want Everyone To See It Too.