...whatever I Ended Up Doing

I Had Not Had Any Drugs For 5 Years But Then I Relapsed Again. I Have Also Smoked Nearly Everything. Every Day It Was A Battle To Recover, Which I Fought For My Son And Myself.

I've Wanted To Feel Pleasure To The Point Of Insanity. They Call It Getting High, Because It's Wanting To Know That Higher Level, That Godlike Level. You Want To Touch The Heavens, You Want To Feel Glory And Euphoria, But The Trick Is It Takes Work. You Can't Buy It, You Can't Get It On A Street Corner, You Can't Steal It Or Inject It Or Shove It Up Your Ass, You Have To Earn It.

My Days Are Whatever I Want Them To Be. I Don't Have To Go Worry About Chasing Some Chemical To Make Me Feel Ok For A Minute, And Then Make Me Feel Worse.

I Think I'm Still Figuring Out How To Be A Little Less Selfish.

...for The First Time In My Life, A Voice Went Off In My Head:'you Have No Power Over What Happens In Your Life. Drugs Dictate Exactly What You're Going To Do. You've Taken Your Hands Off The Steering Wheel, And You're Going Wherever The Drug World Takes You.' That Had Never Changed. The Feeling Would Well Up Inside Of Me, And No Matter How Much I Loved My Girl Or My Band Or My Friends Or My Family, When That Siren Song 'go Get High Now' Started Playing In My Head, I Was Off.