We Are Both Drawn To

You Have To Assume That You're Talking To The Most Intelligent, Tuned-in Audience You Could Ever Get. That's The Way You're Going To Get The Best Out Of People. Whether They Know You Or Not Shouldn't Matter For Comedy. They Should Get To Know You Pretty Quickly. And They Should Be Having A Good Time Pretty Quickly.

You Cannot Over Estimate How Infantile Men Are About Sex! Men Are People That Have Sex Because They Have A Headache... Or Are On Fire, Or Have Been Shot In The Head, Or Whatever It Is!

There Are Two Types Of Wine Essentially, And Everybody Knows This. There's The One Where You Drink It And Go, "mmmm, Well That's Ok, Can We Get 8 Of Those Please, Give Us 8 Of Those." There's The Other One, You Know, Where You Go "ga... Bt... Jesus, What Is That?" Very, Very Occasionally I Concede You Will Hit A Subtle One. You Know, Where You Go "ga... Ba... Ah, Actually That's Not That Bad, That Is. It's Quite Nice."

Everybody Is Corrupted By Hotel Rooms. You Can't Help It. It's The Only Place In The World Where You Walk In And The First Think You Do Is Steal Everything Before You Take Your Coat Off.

I'm Irish, Yeah, But I Don't Need To Get Up On A Soapbox About It.