We All Think We're Going

I Just Had A Throwaway Part, Really, If You Think About It. I'm Not A Natural Actor, You Know? I'm A Comedian, Through And Through. And I Really Love My Lines. Those Are The Lines I Want To Do.

I Think Splash Made People Realize That I Was Still Alive, And I Think I Inspired A Lot Of People. I Have People Coming Up To Me All The Time In The Airport Saying, "hey, You Inspired Me To Learn How To Swim!" "you Inspired Me To Start Moving Around More." "you Inspired Me To Start Doing More For Myself." So That Was Good. But Mostly I Took It Because Nobody Had Given Me A Job. And You Know What Really Matters In Life, Right?

One Thing To Remember When You're Successful, Famous, Whatever You Want To Call It - Well-known, Not That Well-known - Whatever You Want To Go. One Thing To Remember Is Your Family's Not Famous, And They're Not Well-known.

I'm A Kid From Minnesota. I Like Seeing Movie Stars! So I'm There At The Ivy, I've Got My Shrimp, Eddie Murphy Comes In With His Gang. I Said To The Waiter, As Any Good Midwestern Boy Would, "hey, Put Eddie's Check On My American Express Card, But Don't Tell Him That I Did It 'til I'm Gone." Next Day I Got A Call From Manager Who Said, "eddie's Doing A Movie, He Was Very Impressed That You Bought Him Lunch." So Remember: Sometimes Buying People Lunch Can Really Work Out Well For You.

It Might Be One Thing To Think About Putting On A Dress, But When You're Actually Putting On A Dress, It's A Weird Thing, Because You're Going, "huh. I'm Putting On A Dress. Do I Leave My Underwear On? Do I Get Some Other Underwear? Is There Something Special I Should Wear?" All That Dumb Stuff. I'd Never Had Any Interest In Putting On My Mom's Clothes, Except To Think, "well, They Are Nice Clothes..."