There's So Much Pollution In

I Had A Terrible Fight With My Wife On New Year's Eve. She Called Me A Procrastinator. So I Finished Addressing The Christmas Cards And Left.

The World Now Has So Many Problems That If Moses Had Come Down From Mount Sinai Today, The Two Tablets He'd Carry Would Be Aspirin.

I Take My Children Everywhere, But They Always Find Their Way Back Home.

There Are Only Two Kinds Of People In This World. The Realists And The Dreamers. The Realists Know Where They Are Going And The Dreamers Have Already Been There.

Lincoln Was Known To Have Walked Miles To Borrow Books, To Get The Most Rudimentary Form Of Education. So What Do We Do On His Birthday? We Close The Schools!