There's Always Someone In Every

I Had One Job That Was Kind Of Cop-like. One Summer I Did Security At A Miniature Golf Course. Just Standing Out In The Sun All Day, Hey, Hey, Excuse Me Sir. Get Your Putter Out Of The Whale's Ass. Come On, This Is A Place Of Miniature Business. This Is Not A Playground Even Though It Looks Like A Playground.

You Have To Learn The Crowd. I Just Pay Attention To Them So I Can Make Sure I Can Make Them Laugh.

When You See Somebody Walking Down The Street Wearing A Superman T-shirt, You Just Want To Shoot Them In The Chest ... When They Start To Bleed Go, I Guess Not

Ex-girlfriends Will Find Themselves In My New Routine. Sometimes They Like That, And Sometimes They Definitely Do Not. But Comedians Should Come With A Giant Warning Or Disclaimer: If You Date Me, It Will Be In My Act.

I Do Try To Keep My Show Very Improvisational. I Don't Work Off A Set List; I Like To Keep It More In The Moment. I Like To Have Information About Where I'm Going, What Might Be Happening In That Particular Region As Well. I Like For People To Feel Like The Show Is For Them.