Then Let's Print Up Some

I Like When They Say A Movie Is Inspired By A True Story. That's Kind Of Silly. "hey, Mitch, Did You Hear That Story About That Lady Who Drove Her Car Into The Lake With Her Kids And They All Drowned?" "yeah, I Did, And You Know What - That Inspires Me To Write A Movie About A Gorilla!"

I'm A Heroine Addict. I Need To Have Sex With Women Who Have Saved Someone's Life.

Once I Saw A Duck Walking Down The Street So I Went Into Subway And Ordered Two Pieces Of Bread, And They Informed Me That They Could Not Do That, Like There Was Some Speical Rule At Subway That Two Pieces Of Bread Weren't Allowed To Touch. So The Woman Asked Me What I Wanted On The Sandwich And I Said I Do Not Care, It Is For A Duck, And She Was Like Oh Then It's Free. I Was Not Aware That Ducks Eat For Free At Subway. It's Like Give Me A Chicken Fajita Sub, But Don't Worry About Ringing It Up, It Is For A Duck.

I Don't Have A Girlfriend. I Just Know A Girl Who Would Get Really Mad If She Heard Me Say That.

Mitch's Pizzaria... This Week's Coupon: Unlimited Free Pizza. Special Note: Coupon Not Good At Any Of The Mitch's Pizza Locations. Free Pizza Oven With Purchase Of A Small Coke. Two-for Tuesday: Buy One Pizza, Get One Franchise Free.